I got a kick out of reading this article this morning which I spotted on the Challies blog. It brings to mind my own situation of being a homemaker... with no kids. Moving around so much over the past couple of years I am often meeting new people and facing the dreaded, "and what do you do?" question. In Ireland I was told by the immigration people, whose job it is to ask this question upon entrance into the country, that I was a "lady of leisure." For a while it was fun to say that but now I am looking for a better answer that yields a better result when faced with said question. I want my answer to reveal in the most serious and gracious way possible that my situation is acceptable by God and my husband and, dare I say, even blessed as well. Matt and I marvel from time to time how the majority of men (and women) do not value a wife at home anymore. Not even in households with kids. It seems that all that is valued anymore is a wage. This seems to be sadly true in many Christian homes as well.
When people find out that I do not work they then immediately assume I am home with the children. When they find out we don't have children and I don't work (GASP!) they don't know what to make of me. Am I lazy? Do I not have any employable skills? Why on earth would I not work? Why on earth do I sit home with no kids? Maybe I am sitting on the couch all day watching soap operas, eating bonbons? Strangers are thrown off by this domestic situation of mine. And some people who aren't strangers but friends and family don't know what to make of it either. Some even look down on it. And some are even Christians.
I mean what kind of wife must I be? And what kind of man must my husband be to allow such? What goes on in this strange household?! Well let me tell you. My husband comes home to a clean, inviting home with a relaxing atmosphere where he can unwind from a day of stressful work. Don't get me wrong, my husband enjoys his work but he does work in a challenging field where his mind must be fully engaged or else people die. That being said he appreciates coming home- not to chaos or additional work- but to relax and enjoy a homemade meal. You see I love to care for my husband and my home. I love to cook, bake, clean, organize, make our home beautiful, and even mow the lawn! I love to spend money wisely and find the best prices on all that we buy. I am by no means a perfect wife but I try to do whatever I can so that when my husband gets home he can just chill and we can spend time together doing things we enjoy. Sounds ludicrous doesn't it?! On top of my immediate household responsibilities I also have time for other things, such as attending Bible studies, reading, ministry, learning new things to benefit my household (gardening, canning, and sewing are on the horizon) and I actually have time for people.
We are blessed by God in Matt's career. He enjoys what he does and he brings home the bacon. I do not have to hold a job outside the home but that doesn't mean I don't bring value to our household. I used to work outside the home in a "real job," a career I could have retired from someday. But homemaking is what I was cutout for. Homemaking is my vocation. I do not miss the workplace at all and I am so thankful that I am able to stay home and care for my family and home. Thanks and praise be to God for this wonderful blessing.
4 comments:
What do you REALLY do? Ha! Good blog. I just want you to add babysitting to the list! It is true it is looked at just as you said. You are actually the only stay at home wife I know! Amazing!
Loved this post, Dana! Miss you!
Go get 'em!! My wife stays home with 3 children, and she'll be the first to tell you, there's plenty of work to be done without even considering the kids!!
Just wandered onto your blog, and found it very encouraging to know that there are other couples out there that truly value the valuable (not money!!).
God bless you both,
Jared
fantastic... have you used some of your veggies?
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